GUIDING TEENS

Parents need to realize that they know their own teen better than anyone. They often have an intuitive sense of what their teenager
can handle and the meaning of their teen's behavior.

These guidelines will assist them in guiding and understanding teens:

GIVE TEENAGERS CLEAR RULES ~

Adolescents need help in setting limits on their behaviors. And, they can be involved in the setting of these rules. Often, teenagers
reset  rules and test the limits, but parents should not be afraid to insist on behaviors that reserve their values. Parents can show
respect for their teenager's feeling and opinions but should reserve the right to limit some of their actions. Teens gain strength and
self-respect from parents who are clear and consistent in their expectations and willing to discuss reasons for their decisions.

DON'T OVER-REACT ~

Some parents are so anxious about their child's teen year that they react with severe punishment any time their teenager "steps out of line."
Frequently, punishment does not help a teenager with self-control. Usually it is better for parents to discuss their feelings about problem
behavior with their teenagers and work out and enforce mutually acceptable behavior standards.

ACCEPT ADOLESCENT BEHAVIOR ~

Sometimes adolescents are moody, restless, critical and self-centered. This can be hard to tolerate. Remember that these behaviors indicate
the inner turmoil that is part of personality growth. Learn to accept unlikeable behavior without approving of it. Most teen behavior is transitory -
it too shall pass away.

GIVE SUPPORT ~

Teenagers still need and usually react positively to parental help and encouragement. If teenagers make mistakes or behave irresponsibly,
avoid criticism or blame. Describe what has happened and discuss what can be done about it. Encourage independence and allow them
to make decisions about their own lives whenever possible. Resist the desire to intervene. allow teenagers to take respoonsibility when
you see them handling it well.